Writers as Olympians

With the London 2012 Olympic Games in full swing and gold, silver, and bronze medals going to the world's top athletes, I've been contemplating the wide breadth of events and wondering what it would be like to have an Olympic Games for writers. What events would best suit what types of writers?

Were there such a competition, here's how I think things might stack up:

1. Marathon Runners--Novelists; scribes of epic tomes. Writers in it for the long haul.
2. Sprinters--Shorts story writers; ad copywriters.  Writers who specialize in brevity and speed.
3. Synchronized swimmers--collaborative screenwriters. Writers who work seamlessly with others.
4. Boxers--Investigative journalists; op-ed columnists. Writers who pull no punches.
5. Wrestlers--Whitepaper freelancers. Writers unafraid to put their arms around a subject.
6. Divers--Tech writers. Writers whose every move must be exact down to the finest detail.
7. Gymnasts--Agency writers. Writers forced to vault blindly and jump through hoops for clients.
8. Powerlifters--Speechwriters. Writers whose words carry great weight, but risk leaving a resounding thud.
9. Hurdlers & Steeplechase runners-- Corporate marketing writers.Writers who face a myriad of obstacles from the starting gun to the finish line.

 Got any suggestions of your own? Feel free to post them in the comments field.